ไปอ่านเจอมา ขำดี เลยเอามาแปะไว้

Kulula เป็นสายการบิน low cost ที่มีสนญ.ที่โจฮันเนสเบิร์ก แอฟริกาใต้ สายการบินนี้ เวลากัปตันหรือพนักงานบนเครื่องบินประกาศบนเครื่องบินมันจะมีอะไรฮาๆอยู่บ่อยๆ ที่ไปอ่านเจอนี่เป็นส่วนหนึ่งที่มีคนรวบรวมไว้ ขอไม่แปลนะคะ

---o0o---

On another flight with a very "senior" flight attendant crew, the pilot said, "Ladies and gentlemen, we've reached cruising altitude and will be turning down the cabin lights. This is for your comfort and to enhance the appearance of your flight attendants."

---o0o---

On landing, the stewardess said, "Please be sure to take all of your belongings. If you're going to leave anything, please make sure it's something we'd like to have."

---o0o---

After a particularly rough landing during thunderstorms in the Karoo, a flight attendant on a flight announced, "Please take care when opening the overhead compartments because, after a landing like that, sure as hell everything has shifted."

---o0o---

From a Kulula employee: "Welcome aboard Kulula 245 to Calgary. To operate your seat belt, insert the metal tab into the buckle, and pull tight. It works just like every other seat belt; and, if you don't know how to operate one, you probably shouldn't be out in public unsupervised."

---o0o---

"In the event of a sudden loss of cabin pressure, masks will descend from the ceiling. Stop screaming, grab the mask, and pull it over your face. If you have a small child travelling with you, secure your mask before assisting with theirs. If you are travelling with more than one small child, pick your favourite."

---o0o---

"Your seat cushions can be used for flotation; and in the event of an emergency water landing, please paddle to shore and take them with our compliments."

---o0o---

"As you exit the plane, make sure to gather all of your belongings. Anything left behind will be
distributed evenly among the flight attendants.. Please do not leave children or spouses."

---o0o---

Heard on Kulula 255 just after a very hard landing in Cape Town: The flight attendant came on the intercom and said, "That was quite a bump, and I know what y'all are thinking. I'm here to tell you it wasn't the airline's fault, it wasn't the pilot's fault, it wasn't the flight attendant's fault, it was the asphalt."

---o0o---

Part of a flight attendant's arrival announcement: "We'd like to thank you folks for flying with us today. And, the next time you get the insane urge to go blasting through the skies in a pressurized metal tube, we hope you'll think of Kulula Airways."