บันทึกเก่าเล่าความรู้สึก .. ใครอีกคน
บันทึกเก่าใน //wwwdiary.com
3/7/2004 :: How Can I Make My Honey Happier.
Chart writes: Sweethert, I always think that how can I make my honey happier beside faithful and honest with you.
In general, with true love, we might do or say something unusual that might hurt our loved ones' feeling unintentionally. For instance, I think as long as we have not yet married, we should not be selfish by keeping or blocking our loved ones with us forever. If they find somebody who is good, responsible, and truely love her or him, we should be happy to see them have a better future and let them go.
Unfortunately, after I mentioned that idea to you, you was so upset and crying. I finally relized that thought really hurt my sweetheart's feeling. I am sorry that I had said such a thing that made you so sad and cry. I am very sorry, honey. Actually, I am ten times sorrier than you when I realized that it really hurt you. Now, I promiss I will not say that to you again. I will love you, protect you, and be with you as long as I am alive.
I know that you are so smart, sweet, and nice. We even sware to share our good times, our laughs, and our infinite love.
Darling, you always make me happy every time I chat with you, and I will certainly make you happier in return.
Always love you, HONEY.
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3/8/2004 :: Learn How to Trust and Be Positive
Chart writes:
Dearest Ey, I should be proud of what you have said about me. In fact, I just behave myself I'm supposed to be --nice to you and all other mentally, verbally, and physically. It seems to me that you admire me too much, and make me feel embarassed if I cannot fullfil your expectation. I eventually try to do my best whatever I do: school, work, love with you--A+++++, or some other good things. Because I believe if we want to be accepted as a professional person, we must exert our effort one hundred percent. Respect ourselves and others. The idea behind my behavior is to see you and my sourrounding people happy. That makes me happy.
On the other hand, YOU are so nice to me and I admire and respect the way you are. Every time I talk to you, I feel so good and do not want to end our conversation at all. I think understanding, care, and love are the main things that form our love.
On YOUR LAST PARAGRAPH OF THE LAST ENTRY, the message was so emotional to me, HONEY. You expressed like someone will find me and take me away from you, worse than that I will also go with that stranger easily. That is a scarry thought, darling. Do not think like that. Be positive and confident. I want my sweetheart to be confident and live your life the best with full efforts of your intelligence. You are the most valuable lady in my life after my mother and sisters. We will be together as the moon wll never leave the night ( do not laugh at me... darling :) ). Remember, my darling, be positive and kind to yourself. I will always love you!
What is going on with my life today, March 8, 2004? Well, it turned out to be a very good day. First thing of my mornig after waking up was wondering:
"It is 7 o'clok in the evening in Thailand. Where is my
honey right now? Did she get home safely? Is she ok?
I wisht she is ok and safe at her condo, and probably
thinking of me. Oh... did she leave me a message or
notes on the diary yet?"
Then, I had breakfast and went to the college at about 8:15 a.m. Today, we learned about finding the second derivative of a function. If you like you may check that textbook Web site at //www.college.hmco.com/mathematics/larson/calculus_analytic/7e/students/index.html.
After that I had a Programming in C class, we wrote a small program containing an array. It was supposed to check the integers entered by the user and display wether the result is parlindrume. We enjoyed the class very much. Another good thing for the class was we did not have any homeworks or assignments due today. It was cool, wasn't it? Those were the only two classes I had for today.
Now, I am writing this diary for my Sweetheart Ey, watch CNBC channel to check what is going on in the market.
Right now, it is 2:35 p.m. central standard time here, but in Thailand it is late at night. You are asleep I guess. I hope you did not stay up so late, honey. You should sleep at least seven hours a night. I will call you when you get up this morning.
LOVE YOU as always.
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3/9/2004 :: Where Is My Honey.
Chart writes to his sweetheart, Ey:
March 9, 2004. 12:15 p.m. CT.
Hi honey :) I know we are in different time zones: I am awake while you are asleep; You are working while I am sleeping; I am studying while you are relaxing. But we have the most important thing in common--we love each other very much. You are in my mind all the time and I am sure you have me in your mind; however, I still want to know "How is my darling? Where is she? Does she know I miss her so much?"
I keep checking this diary frequently to see if my honey left me a lovely message. I understand that you may be too busy to write me very often since you have to be on the raod several hours a day. Traffic in Bangkok is very bad; furthermore, the polution is the worst for my baby's health. Just hang in there for a while, honey. I will bring you here so we can be togehter days and nights, do not have to worry about each other.
Honey, how was your day? Were you so tired? Did you miss me?
Today, I had Thai food for lunch and fired chicken. It was so good. I thought that it would be better and more delicious if you ate with me. Everything must be great to have you by my side all the time.
Yesterday, I bid a Dell Inspiron 8600 notebook computer on eBay. It comes with P4m 1.7 GHz, 15.4 monitor, 512 GB Ram, 128 VDO card., 80 GB hard drive, Windows XP pro. I bid for $1525, but someone outbid me for $1550 at the final second. It was ok. Maybe I deserve a better one. Be positive and hopeful for the better :)
Tonight I have a class and will be back around 9 o'clock. If I do not call you the time I used to call, be aware I am always think of you and love you.
I LOVE YOU HONEY.
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3/13/2004 :: Go For It
Chart writes from the Sunshine State to his sweetheart in Bangkok:
Hi honey. Hopefully you are ok. I learned that you were out and got home very late yesterday. I am worry about your safety and your health since you have to spend hours on the road between home and office and work sometimes longer than regular business hours. I even think that after we married you should take it easy and stay home, do not have to work. On the other hand, I think it must be very boring to stay home all day long and wait for me to get back from work. Furthermore, you work so hard to get a master degree in order to be a house wife. That does not make sense! You should keep working ;)
Life should be challenge and enjoyable, I believe. That way we will be proud of what we have done when we are young and healthy. I should not concer about you too much, I guess.
A couple life requires patience, trust, forgiveness, and well-wishes between each other. It is not easy sometimes, but no matter how hard it is we will go for it. Because we believe that to be together is to share happiness and suffering, good luck and bad luck, wealth and poorness, or success and failure, we must acheive our goal one day as long as we do not give up! I found the a very beautiful poetry a friend forwards me :
"Sometimes the road of life becomes unbearable
and it seems easier to give up than to go on.
But you should always remember that
there is light at the end of the tunnel.
For every tear; you will smile, for every rainy day;
There will be a rainbow, and for every moment of every day,
forever and always there will be
someone there to love you and to confide in.
I will always be there for you.
To carry you over the rocky roads and lead you through the tunnels,
to share with you the smiles, the tears, the rainydays and the rainbows.
Whenever you need me I will be there."
LOVE YOU AS ALWAYS, EY.
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SMS Message in memorial
23-Feb-2547 :: Be positive, good and strong b/c lots of people who love you are behind you.
29-Feb-2547 :: You know what? During you sleep, you're not sleep really sleep na. honey you actually kept talking with me all day long. That made me think of you all day long darling.
1-Mar-2547 :: Honey I don't think of you only when I'm asleep.
2-Mar-2547 :: Keep in mind "you are not alone" At least, one person miss you here. Do you see me? I'm here behing you.
11-Mar-2547 :: I want to marry with you. Do you want to marry me? I want to be with you. Do you want to be with me?
22-Mar-2547 :: Even I call you or not you know I miss you and love you.
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เมื่อวันเวลาผ่านไป ย้อนกลับมาดูเรื่องราวบันทึกต่างๆ ก็รู้สึกดีนะ ถึงแม้มันจะผ่านมานานแล้ว และบางอย่างก็เปลี่ยนไปแล้ว ..
เมื่อมันเหงาก็ต้องเหงา ยังไงก็ต้องทน ถนนของความเดียวดายยังอีกไกล เมื่อมันเหงาก็ต้องเหงา ต้องอยู่ให้ได้ ชีวิตดำเนินต่อไป ขาดเขาแล้วมันจะตายให้รู้ไป
บางเวลาที่ชีวิตเราก็ต้องเจอเรื่องราวต่างๆ ทุกๆ อย่างของชีวิตเป็นไปตามกลไกธรรมชาติที่ควรจะเป็น ไม่มีใครไม่เคยเจอความทุกข์ ความทุกข์เป็นสิ่งที่ทุกคนต้องเผชิญ แต่แตกต่างกันที่ความทุกข์ของใครจะหนักกว่ากันแค่ไหนเท่านั้น และสิ่งสำคัญเราจะผ่านมันไปได้ไหม มันคือบทพิสูจน์ของชีวิต หลายครั้งหลายคราวที่ถนนของชีวิตต้องเจอกับอุปสรรคมากมาย กว่าจะก้าวเดินผ่านถนนแต่ละเส้นของชีวิต ช่างเหนื่อยช่างท้อเสียเหลือเกิน
ฉันเดินทางมาเกือบครึ่งชีวิต ผ่านเรื่องราวต่างๆ มากมาย ทุกอย่างผ่านได้มาโดยตลอด ครั้งนี้ก็ต้องเช่นกัน ฉันต้องผ่านมันไปให้ได้ ต้องยอมรับความเปลี่ยนแปลงครั้งนี้ให้ได้ ถนนเส้นใหม่อาจไม่ได้ราบเรียบเหมือนที่เคยเดินผ่านมา สิ่งที่ขวางอยู่ข้างหน้าอาจจะเป็นหลุมในใจ แต่ถ้าผ่านมันไปได้ ฉันก็จะเข้มแข็งเหมือนเดิม
บางช่วงเวลาที่คนอย่างฉันเจอเรื่องหนักๆ หลายครั้ง ก็ยังผ่านพ้นมันมาได้ ความเหงาใครๆ ก็ต้องเจอทุกคน สุดท้ายก็ขึ้นอยู่กับว่า เราจะเลือกเหงาแบบไหน และไม่นานนักมันก็จะจางไปเหมือนที่ผ่านมา สุดท้ายมันก็คืออดีต แต่ก็ต้องขอบคุณวันเวลาพัดพาสิ่งดีๆ ผ่านเข้ามา แม้จะเป็นลมเย็นๆ สักพัก ที่ทำให้หัวใจใครบางคนรู้สึกดีก็ตาม และท้ายที่สุดกำลังใจที่ฝากไว้กับคนอื่น ก็ต้องเก็บกลับมาอยู่กับตัวเองอีกครั้ง...
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| Last Update : 17 กรกฎาคม 2554 16:14:09 น. |
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