i'm trying again.
here again. i'm trying to have another cycle after failing last cycle. this time at the moment i am not so sad about last cycle that it didn't happen. i am looking forward to the next one and hopefully this round it'll work. actually this period i should be happy since once the embryos are transferred, i will be anxious and lot of emotions mixed up. let say i will be screwed. ones have said it is the most terrible 2 weeks of waiting. i'm sure i will know whether i will be pregnant or not by the end of first week. lots of signs of pregnancy should show and i know my body very well and i can tell whether i am or am not. that makes me mad actually. i wish i could shut down my brain so i do not have to think about it too much. i don't want to face the reality. just in case this time won't work which i don't want to think like that just be positive, i will have some level of satisfaction of knowing at least i've tried. i wont lose time and energy and money and anything for nothing. but if it works it's worth every cent, i mean it. just looking for the bright future. if this round works it will be the best present i've ever had for chistmas. please santa make my wish comes true.
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